Candycandycandy
by Pianogirl123
Summary: Wrath goes Trickortreating and drags envy along. Total insaneness. No no! dont give him coffee!
1. Chapter 1

**Candycandycandy**

Ok, I don't own fma, and whatever else might be in here.

Warnings: Insane hyper homunculi XD

K, lets start!

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Wrath bounced down the hallway of—wherever they live and bounced around Envy who was in a mad mood today.

"ENVY"

"WHAT!"

"Today is Halloween! Kids go trick-or-treating on Halloween! So, can we go? PLEASE?"

"Why TF do you want to do that for?"

"FREE CANDY OF COURSE!"

"Oh, hmm… lets go!" said envy. At the idea of free candy, he stopped being in a bad mood and turned into his usual cool shape-shifting awesome envy-ful self.

"Hey aren't we supposed to dress up as something?"

"What? What do we need costumes for! We're like—homunculi! And I can like be whatever I want and you are just really creepy anyway."

"Ok, good point!"

So it was about 4:00 and Envy and Wrath set off on a journey with only one goal in mind: CANDY!

They went to central and charged into the headquarters or whatever its called. Since no one in the military really cared about this kid's stuff, they were all working like normal people. Envy changed his form to look like Major Armstrong so no one noticed wrath behind him anyway. They charged into the women's dorms (envy changed to look like Mustang) and burst into a random room. Wrath jumped around the person in their yeling "gimmecandygimmecandygimmecandy!" Said person was in fact Riza Hawkeye who happened to be half-dressed, and seeing her superior just burst into her dorm room with some hyper kid, she pulled out her gun and shot at them, so they ran out into the hallway.

"Wahhh we didn't get any candy!" Said wrath, them still running out of the barracks.

"Well, we saw something we shouldn't have, that was fun, right?"

"…Huh?"

"Never mind. You're just a kid, so you wouldn't understand."

Next they ran into Roy Mustang's office, Envy changed into Ed.

Roy started, "fullmetal shr—"

But Ed-Envy and Wrath just bounced around him yelling "GIVE US CANDY GIVE US CANDY!"

"IN CASE YOU HAVENT NOTICED, THIS IS THE MILITARY HEADQUARTERS! SO GO TRICK-OR-TREAT ELSEWHERE!"

Wrath just stood there. "…Candy?" cute puppy-dog eyes

"Alright, fine! Look, I don't have any candy, but here's some coffee," Said Roy handing the hyper homunculus his coffee."

Ed-Envy: "Wait I don't think this is a good—"

But Wrath had already bounced out of the facility and out onto the streets, so Ed-Envy ran after him, changing into his normal form as he ran. Wrath knocked on some random person's house and a 2-foot-tall old lady answered.

"Well, hello there! And what are you supposed to be?"

"I'm a homunculus! Does that count?" said wrath.

"Isn't that nice? Here's some candy for you!"

"YAY!" said envy.

Then they ran up and down the streets of central and got lots more candy.

"Wow, we have a lot!" said Envy.

"Yeah, this is getting heavy."

Then they ran into lust who was just walking around randomly with Gluttony by her side.

"Hey Lust, can you take this candy for us?" said envy dumping their bags into her arms.

"but—"

"And make sure Gluttony doesn't eat too much of it. Thanks!"

"But wait! You can't just leave me with all this!"

Envy and Wrath just hopped on the side of the express train that was about to leave for risembool (ed just happened to be there at the moment) and they were off. The train ride now took only 20 minutes instead of 8 hours because they had switched to pretty aerodynamic Metra trains (don't own it!)

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Ok next chapter will be even better! Review please! 


	2. Equivalence

It's only about 3-5 hours after i just finished writing the last chapter. I had nothing else to do, so why not put this up too?

Some things i do not own: Metra, Snickers, Playstation, and Nintendo and of course the Full Metal Alchemist.

**Chapter 2. Risembool

* * *

**

Envy and Wrath got off the train at risembool.

"You know, it's a good thing the author upgraded our world's technology. Otherwise, we'd never get to go to all these cool places in one night," Wrath commented.

"Yeah. I find it amazing that these people have the technology to make automail limbs as good as the ones in star wars, yet they still drive these old fashioned automobiles, and the trains go at like 30 mph max and they don't even have cell phones or CDs," said Envy.

"Ok, enough speculation. CANDY!"

The first house they went to no one was home. They had left a bowl of snickers minis with a post-it note (which hasn't yet been invented in this world) saying, 'please take one.'

The two sins did what any normal person would have done—take it all!

Then they went to five random people's houses.

Then they walked across Ed's old burnt out house.

"HELLO! ANYONE HOME!" yelled Wrath.

"Uh, hello! In case you haven't noticed, IT'S BURNT TO THE GROUND!"

"…"

"…"

"…So?" Envy: anime fall.

Wrath searched around in the debris and found a sugar jar. He opened it.

"Look, Envy! It's caramel!" (A/N: I'm not sure—my dad told me that caramel was melted sugar)

There was a sugar spoon stuck in it and the stuff was hard like rock candy and for whatever reason it had not been rotted or eaten over the course of 4 years. Wrath picked up the jar, which was made out of stone, and dropped it, causing the jar to break, leaving a caramel sugar-bowl-popsicle-spoon-thingy.

"See?"

"OK…"

After Wrath had accidentally dropped his caramel-sugar-bowl-popsicle-spoon-thingy into the river and cried for five minutes over it, they went to Winry and Pinako's house, where Ed and Al were also staying.

Wrath knocked on the door, and it was answered by none other than

Camera looks at Ed's feet, then zooms in on his arm, then on his elevator boots, then on his antennae, and then goes back to his feet and goes VERY, VERY slowly upward. After 60 long seconds, the camera is on his _area_, and then it stops because the automatically moving tripod broke down. The camera continued to look at Ed's zipper while the maintenance crew spent 5 minutes fixing the tripod. Meanwhile, everybody reading this starts giggling (giggle, dammit!), especially some of the girls and Ed starts swearing at everyone, but can't move anything except his mouth or he'll ruin the shot. Finally, the camera gets to Ed's face which is now really, really, REALLY funny.

Edward Elric. THE FULL METAL ALCHEMIST!

"HEY! I believe **_I_** am the protagonist here!" yelled Wrath. "Now, gimme some candy!"

"I'll trade you for my arm."

"NEVER!"

"Ok, fine, be like that. This whole basket of candy plus the three others I have and this random blueberry pie." (winry: my pie!)

"NOO!"

"Ok, ok! Forget the candy. How about this. I'll give you my playstation, and my gamecube, and ALL of the games for them."

"Hmmm…"

"Wrath no! If you give up your arm you can't do alchemy!" said Envy who was starting to get worried.

"I'm no fool. I know those games don't mean anything to you because you are never home to play them anyway! Let's see… also give me every single one of your manga and pay for whatever costs I need afterwards for automail for the rest of my life and it's a deal."

"Ok! Ed goes away and comes back with 2 large cardboard boxes full of manga."

Envy picks up one of the manga and starts flipping through it and his face turns red.

"Hey, wait a minute!" Envy throws the book in the crate. "Deal's off." He said as he dragged Wrath off who was yelling kicking and screaming (hey, Ed was offering quite a lot).

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Well, that was certainly a fun way to spend an hour and a half. Review it'll make me D !


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